The Halfling
by Madame Cross Marian
Summary: What if Thorin's company met a half-hobbit in Rivendell? Daughter of Elrond, and just barely an adult by hobbit standards, much less elf or dwarf, they obviously don't want anything to do with her. So of course, she decided to sneak out and join them. Appearently they now have two different definitions of halfling in their company. Which is...good? Fem!Bilbo and OC (not paring!)
1. Chapter 1

AN: I must be a dwobbit. I'm a short, tough person with humongous feet and lots of hair (though thank god I don't have a beard, as I am a girl) and eat a ton. Though I used to be tall. Then I stopped growing. And everyone else kept growing *cries*

-Story Start-

In Rivendell there once lived a half-hobbit named Laissel. By half-hobbit I, of course, mean that one parent was a hobbit and the other was not. And this could be specified to, say, the fact that her mother was a hobbit and her father was an elf. And so she was raised in Rivendell, as her mother died in giving her life- she supposed that either of them lived was the best they could have expected.

She was not tall like the elves, gracious no, but she was not short like the hobbits, nor was she medium sized like a man. She was most accurately described as roughly dwarf height at four foot six, but once again she supposed they couldn't have expected much better.

So, naturally, when thirteen dwarves and a hobbit came marching themselves dirtied and bruised into her home she was nothing but delighted. She wasn't there upon their arrival, of course, as she was scarcely thirty-four- a baby in elf and dwarf standards, and barely into adulthood for hobbits- but simply heard of it on account of her powerful ears and the fact that the people in the next room over were talking to loudly. Yes, that was it. She wasn't an eavesdropper at all- though if she were, then she would know, as all great eavesdroppers do, that it is them who always happen to overhear interesting information.

And thus how she found herself almost violently hugging a very confused Bilbo with the broadest grin any of the company had ever seen on one so small.

"Finally someone who's shorter than me!" She exclaimed delightedly practically jumping for joy, "You have no idea what it's like to be dwarf height growing up with elves!" She declared with animated hand gestures. "No offense meant, of course," she added after glancing over at the group of dwarves.

"Excuse me, but who are you?" Bilbo questioned the rather thrilled girl in front of her. She'd place her at about fourteen by human standards, but judging by her slim build and pointed ears she was at least partially elf and you never knew with them. She cocked her head to the side and gave her with a confused expression before something seemed to click in her mind.

"Oh, I forgot introduce myself! Beg your pardon, Mistress Baggins," she said with a rather embarrassed expression, "you see I'm half-hobbit and I've never met a real hobbit before. Moving along, my name is Laissel and I'm very glad of it as I'd hate to have a name that doesn't suit me, like if I were homely woman named Daisy. That'd be terrible, wouldn't you think?"

"Half-hobbit?"

"Oh, well, my father was an elf and my mother was a hobbit. A Took, I do believe. From what I've heard they have quite the reputation as adventurers among you folk?"

"My mother, Belladonna, was a Took, and yes, they have a reputation, though not an entirely positive one," Bilbo said as she gazed curiously upon the girl. She did not much resemble her mother with her moon-pale skin and fiery locks. Her eyes were large, though not overly so, and almond shaped, and her current excitement made them glitter in such a way they could be understandably mistaken for the silver after which they were colored. The only particularly hobbit things about her were the facts that, despite it's color, her hair fell in lovely curls that in it's length of reaching her hips in gravity defying curls that made her feel quite embarrassed for her now limp chest length ones, and her rather large, bare, feet, though not quite hobbit-sized. She wasn't quite short enough to be a hobbit either, but looked well fit to shuffle unnoticed through a crowd of dwarves.

"Then we're cousins!" She exclaimed excitedly and hugged her so tight she almost appeared to be attacking him. So of course Fíli and Kíli were there in an instant.

"What are you doing to our burglar, elf!"

"Release her!"

"Why?" She questioned but released her nevertheless.

"Why are you so tiny?"

"I just went over this with Bilbo and would prefer not to do it again," she said before contradicting the statement and telling them the same thing she told Bilbo. The other dwarves seemed to have taken her appearance with grain of salt and were talking amongst themselves without a single glance in their direction. Well, Thorin cast over a rather cautious one every once in a while but he wouldn't want you or to know that. He wasn't worried about what happened to the burglar. Their voices were just so loud he couldn't help but look. "Besides, I'm not _tiny_," she declared after her explanation, "I'm only a couple inches shorter than you!" She said in reference to Kíli.

"Whatever you say, Miss," he replied as he looked down at the rather irritated girl who was _clearly_ at least four inches shorter than him. Him and Fíli laughed and walked away, clearly done with whatever business they had decided they had there.

"Mistress Baggins?" Laissel questioned with a wide eyed expression, "This just fell out of your hair..." She held up a broken off twig with a butterfly cacoon on it.

"Oh dear!" Bilbo exclaimed blushing, "You wouldn't happen to have a comb I could borrow, would you?" She couldn't help but feel that that question was a huge mistake at the grin on Laissel's face.

"Of course..."

Yes, definitely a mistake.

-1-1-1-

"W-why?" Bilbo sputtered as she gazed in the mirror. Back at her looked a young hobbit woman with thick strawberry blonde curls the fell delicately to her chest. Not only had Laissel led her to a bath, she had given her an elven dress, one of her old ones. It was a dark green that, while it suited her well enough, she was sure looked stunning on Laissel. Much better than the plain grayish-blue she had carelessly thrown on today.

"Because every girl needs to feel pretty sometimes. And that one dwarf kept looking over at us. The dark-haired one with the nice face," Laissel declared casually.

"Nice face!? He never stops frowning! He's a stuck-up, arrogant, no good- oh. Sorry. I got away from myself for a bit there," Bilbo said as she shook her head as if snapping herself out of her anger. Stupid Thorin.

"Maybe..." Laissel replied with a thoughtful expression, but something in her voice let Bilbo know she doubted it. She almost said something in protest, but decided against it. Elves always had a bit of that air anyways, so maybe it was just that. She didn't want to offend someone who would live forever and for all she knew was related to Elrond or something. "Let's go," Laissel continued as she began a slow, graceful walk towards the door that you wouldn't think capable for someone her height.

"Go where?" Bilbo questioned puzzled. Laissel swung around on her heels in the doorway.

"To meet of with Gandalf and your company for dinner. You didn't think we would let you starve, did you? Though I assume the majority of your dwarves will starve nevertheless, as we don't serve much meat. Fish, sometimes. A good deal of greens," She went on as Bilbo followed her slowly but proudly down the hall. The dress really did make her feel pretty, and she had a feeling that Laissel was just one of those people who were never quite wrong no matter how improbable their statements sounded at first. When they finally reached the pavilion all the dwarves jaws could have dropped at their burglar being "tainted by the elven clothing", but Laissel didn't notice as she ran over and tackle hugged Gandalf.

"Gandalf! It's been forever!"

"Ah, yes, I believe the last time I saw you was back when you were only eight years old. Still loud as ever I see."

"Perhaps, perhaps," she agreed laughing as she waved him off with her hand good-naturedly. After finally releasing the man she sprung over to Elrond with a large smile. He had been looking at her with an expression of concern since she and Bilbo had first appeared, though she either didn't notice or didn't care. Probably both.

"Suil, Ada*!" She said with the charming type of smile you would receive from a child who had done something they weren't supposed to and knew it but was secretly proud of it.

"Cerich prestad laew, sell*," Elrond said with a sigh and a grave expression mixed with a hint of amusement as if he had expected her to be the cause of Bilbo's disappearance.

"Le prestannen allaew*."

"Erui achen. Mae, bado a na hain ertho. Ae gen nuithon, na û lû lastathon i veth e-hon, nauthon*," He said as he gestured to the dwarves too caught up in their own heated (and rather animated I might add) discussion with their burglar.

"Aen. Le hannan, Ada*!" Laissel replied hurriedly as she rushed over to the table so quickly that one who hadn't seen her face may have thought she was being chased by an army of orcs.

Of course things could only have gone down hill from there anyways. And it did- oh, it did- but not in quite that direction...

-Chapter End-

AN: Yay! I quite like how this turned out ^.^

Translations, not literal:

Suil, Ada!- Hi, Daddy!

Cerich prestad laew, sell- You are much trouble, daughter

Le prestannen allaew- You sigh too much/you worry too much

Erui achen. Mae, bado a na hain ertho. Ae gen nuithon, na û lû lastathon i veth e-hon, nauthon- Only for you. Well, go on and join them. If I don't allow you to do so then I suppose I shall never hear the end of it.

Aen. Le hannan, Ada!- Perhaps. Thank you, Daddy!

Literal translations:

Suil, Ada!- Greetings, Daddy!

Cerich prestad laew, sell- You do frequent troubling, daughter

Le prestannen allaew- You are troubled very frequently

Erui achen. Mae, bado a na hain ertho. Ae gen nuithon, na û lû lastathon i veth e-han, nauthon- Alone for you. Well, go and unite with them. If I do not allow you to continue, at no time shall I hear the end of it, I think

Aen. Le hannon, Ada!- Maybe. I thank you, Daddy!

I would like to thank Morelen ( activity?show=cevQ8wq1aa) from yahoo answers for the lovely translations. She gave me so much more than what I show you here, such as multiple ways to say things, as well as grammar and vocabulary lists. She truly deserves a ton of credit, and I am genuinely thankful. If you read this, please leave a review- I hope you liked it if you did read it (I mean, most people OBVIOUSLY read my stories for their author's notes) because with your wonderful translations this deserves to be a great story and I hope I lived up to that :)


	2. Chapter 2

"Oh my," Bilbo breathed out a mixture of a surprise and horror. For running towards them, much as she herself had not so long ago, was Laissel. Her hobbit hair whipped wildly around her and she half tripped on her skirt more than once. She didn't seem to carry anything with her but a blade of elvish make beating rapidly against her hip and a broad smile. She had a feeling this couldn't possibly be good.

"Wait! Wait for me!" The girl panted as the company grudgingly paused. She wondered if this was some strangely specific curse to plauge those with Tooks for mothers.

"What is it, Laissel?" She quirked her eyebrow hoping the girl wouldn't respond how she thought she was going to respond.

"I've decided to join you in your quest to reclaim the dwarven homeland."

"_No._" Thorin gave a glare that seemed to be simultaneously directed at Laissel and Bilbo. She glared back.

"But I'm really good with a dagger!"

"Many here are." He looked at Bilbo. "And not a word from you either, burglar."

"Did you just try to give me an order? I am not your servant, Mister Oakenshield. You'll do well to remember that." She huffed. "It's not like I was going to encourage her anyways. She's a child."

"I'm not a child!"

"That's what a child would say." Bilbo adopted a scolding motherly tone to address the girl.

"That's hardly a fair argument considering an adult would say that too."

"But with a very different tone." She placed her hands on her hips. "Besides I can hardly imagine your father condones this."

"What Ada doesn't know won't kill him- anyways, he's millenniums old, I hardly think he'll notice if I'm gone for a few months."

"Last time I checked he was quite well aware the meager hours you were away just yesterday."

"No comment."

"I refuse to allow an elf in my company."

"_Partial_ elf. Besides, you have to go through Mirkwood, right? You think Thranduil's just gonna let over a dozen dwarves plus a wizard and a hobbit go traipsing through his forest undisturbed? And how exactly did you plan to find your way out though the elf magic?"

"We do not require your assistance in order to refrain from getting lost, elf. As you mentioned, we do have a wizard."

"Not right now you don't. Who knows when he'll show up again."

"Just let her come with us, uncle. I bet she'd just follow us anyways if we didn't let her," Fili interjected.

"Yes, I'm afraid we're stuck with her," Kili said in poorly masked optimism at the prospect of such a fiery addition to the group. Thorin glared like they'd all agreed to abandon the quest to start a traveling band of hula dancers.

"...Give the elf a pony." His started off but seemed to reconsider. "You won't be paid, the treasure is staying split into fourteenths."

"I have no interest in gold or trinkets, so that's fine with me."

"And if you bring harm to any member of my group-"

"I'll be sure to head back myself immediately." She grinned. With one final grimace as her presence, which he seemed to think was a cause to some foul taste on his tongue, he finally stormed off to the front with he cloak flapping out behind him in a simultaneously majestic and over dramatic motion.

"Well I think that went rather well," she beamed at her clearly decided favorites of the group. The pair laughed with an edge of disbelief as she slung herself onto the horses back, humming some presumably elvish song all the while.

-1-1-1-

"Thinking of home?" Laissel's sudden break to the silence upon the caves almost made Bilbo squeak as she jumped to look back at the girl. She had a knowing but sad smile on her face. "Or going there?"

"You heard Thorin. I have no place here- he's right."

"Is he now?"

"You disagree? You're half-hobbit, at the least, even if only on the Took side. And the elves are a grounded, respectable people. People with a home. Do you not, then, understand why I should go?"

"I understand a great many things. That doesn't mean I have to agree with them."

"Then enlighten me, for I do not! We both left our homes the second a sniff of adventure came wafting our way, nothing but the clothes on our backs, but what for? Because Gandalf made me? It is not my home! I'm not the one with no place to belong to, and neither are you!"

"Really now? Have you tried being the shortest person everywhere you go? The strangest looking, the fattest? The one person who isn't some passive elf lady carrying with her the wisdom of the ages? The child? I don't even know what species I am. A helf? An elbit? If anything, I'm testing something. A theory of mine I've had since I was small. I've always thought, sitting in my room at home, 'a long time ago nobody would look twice at this spot. it would be a rock, or a tree, or a patch of dirt and no one would call it home. somebody had to make it that way. somebody who'd never been there before made it their home.' The theory that somewhere I've never been could become my home. That's what drives me on. Is it not the same for you? A place where you belong?" She cocked her head with a true inquisitiveness she hadn't been expecting. "Not everyone can be respectable forever."

"Listen, Laissel. I'm not a Took- not like you. I'm a Baggins. And Bagginses are respectable."

"Then it's a good thing we're both half-breeds." Before Bilbo could reply Laissel's head had swerved around and soon they were both staring at Bilbo's sword. "What in the world is that?"

Bilbo unsheathed her 'letter-opener' with the hand of someone who wished nothing more than to leave the thing alone and remain in ignorance. It was glowing bright blue over bother of their faces. Laissel's mouth fell into an exaggerated 'o' and as if on cue the ground began to crack behind them.

"Shit."

"Wake up. Wake up!"

1-1-1

"She's thought of nothing but her soft bed and her warm house since first she stepped out of her door. We will not be seeing our hobbit again. She is long gone."

"No," Bilbo stepped out from her place behind the tree. "She isn't."

"Bilbo Baggins! I've never been so glad to see anyone in my life."

"Bilbo! We'd given you up-"

"I hadn't!" Laissel childishly pointed out.

"How on earth did you get past the goblins?" Bilbo refrained from wincing at Fili's question.

"How indeed."

"Ahaha..." Bilbo did the unconvincing guilt laugh as she slipped her fingers into her waist-coat pocket.

"Well what does it matter?" Gandalf saved her. "She's back."

"It matters. I want to know-" She wandered if 'tension thick enough to cut with a knife was just an expression. "why did you come back?"

She thought about it for a moment. "Look," she glanced at Laissel. "I know you doubt me. I know you always have. And your right. I often think of bag end. I miss my books. And my armchair, and my garden. See, that's where I belong. That's home. And that's why I came back. Because you don't have one. A home. It was taken from you. But I will help you take it back if I can."

Laissel smiled as she watched them. She hoped Bilbo knew Thorin was listening to her. She had a good feeling about the pair. Or maybe she just had an inbred penchant for interracial romance. Either way, it was an elves sacred duty to be wise, and detached as often as possible. Good thing she wasn't and elf (_ahem, Thorin)._

A warg howl snapped her from her thoughts.

"Shit."

-1-1-1-

"I have never been so wrong in my life."

"Called it," Laissel and Fili simultaneously half-whispered and held out their hands to Kili. He grudgingly dropped a small bags in both's hands. None of the others seemed to notice, save perhaps Gandalf who only smiled in his knowing, or as Laissel called it "smug-ass" manner.

"Is that what I think it is?"

Laissel broke out her contemplative, and not at all ridiculous looking (shut up Kili) staring contest with the wizard as she turned to see what had everyone so awed. And when it came to the half open, and much more ridiculous than hers mouths on which their current expressions centered, she was ashamed to say she joined them.

-Chapter End-

AN: Sorry if Laissel seems just useless so far, she'll cause things to mix up a lot more once Mirkwood. And, if you're willing to offer opinions on the matter, should i pair her up with Kili (or even Fili)? I'd like to, but I don't want her to distract from Kili and Fili's bond as brothers (somethings I felt Tauriel did in the movies, hence why she won't be found here. You either, Legolas. Sorry buddy.) Also what parts follow book canon VS what follows movie canon depends on a broad variety of factors, the greatest one being "what do I have access to"? Of course I can always go from memory, but, possibly because I'm OCD, this makes me very uneasy and I thusly avoid it as much as possible. All movie bits, or almost all, must be something I can either find clips of online, or reliable transcripts. Once my brother finds my copy of the hobbit movies I let him borrow (he's missing so many of my books and movies I swear I'm gonna have to search his room next time he goes out), it returns to factor 2- simply what I do or do not like, and what best serves my story. HOWEVER if you guys are incredibly pro OR adverse to an idea of mine, _**PLEASE SAY SO IN THE REVIEWS.**_ They're there for a reason, guys- so I can give you a better product and we both go to bed happier people.

Also after BoFA I can't watch the first two hobbits CLIPS without crying imagine the whole freaking movie! This chapter was hell, especially the Thorin and Bilbo hug thing- I didn't even cry when he (**SPOILERS)**

**SPOILERS**

died in the films, but god forbid he hugs someone, my water ducts just collapse.


End file.
